WHAT A PUTZ!
IT’S TIME THE GEEZER PUT A LITTLE CULTURE IN YOUR LIFE. LET’S DISCUSS MICHELANGELO. WHEN I TOLD ONE OF MY DIMWIT FRIENDS HE THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO WRITE ABOUT MIKE ANGELO WHO OWNS A PIZZA PARLOR CLOSE BY. THIS SAME RETARD HEARD ME ASKING FOR MY PASTA DONE AL DENTE AND HE SWORE HE KNEW THE GUY…I EXPLAINED NOT A FELLOW NAMED “AL DENTE”…THAT IT WAS A COOKING PROCESS. MY FRIEND IS SO BAD HE HAS TO HANG A MEAT LOAF AROUND HIS NECK TO GET HIS DOG’S ATTENTION.
BACK TO THE BRILLIANT MICHELANGELO. HE WAS A WORLD FAMOUS RENAISSANCE SCULPTURE, PAINTER, ARCHITECT…AND HOMOSEXUAL. HE LIVED AND WORKED IN THE EARLY 15-HUNDREDS. NOT MANY GAY BARS IN THOSE DAYS BUT HE WAS AHEAD OF HIS TIMES AND HAD A COLLECTION OF JUDY GARLAND RECORDS.
MICELANGELO IS FAMOUS FOR HIS PIETA AND HIS DAVID. I’M NOT TALKING ABOUT HIS SHVANTZ….IT’S AN INCREDIBLE SCULPTURE. BUT “MIKE” AS HE LIKED TO BE CALLED, MOST FAMOUS ART WORK WAS THE SISTINE CHAPEL IN ROME. POPE JULIUS II – (FAMILY NAME OF GOLDBERG) – YES, THERE WERE MANY JEWISH POPE’S…POPE SHECKY, THE FIRST, COMES TO MIND. – JULIE, BECAME MIKE’S PATRON AND ONE DAY COMMISSIONED HIM TO PAINT THE CEILING OF THE SISTINE CHAPEL. MIKE TOOK THE ASSIGNMENT AND TOLD JULIUS, WHO WAS ABOUT TO LEAVE ROME TO START ANOTHER WAR, NOT TO WORRY –LEAVE EVERYTHING IN MIKE’S FILTHY HANDS. I SAY “FILTHY” BECAUSE MICHELANGELO NEVER WASHED. NEVER! HIS FATHER HAD TOLD HIM THAT WASHING IS THE CAUSE OF THE BLACK PLAGUE…AND BRITTLE HAIR.
JULIUS WENT OFF TO WAR AND MIKE BEGAN PAINTING THE SISTINE CHAPEL. IT TOOK HIM SEVERAL YEARS AND HE COULDN’T WAIT TO SHOW OLD JULIE THE SCENES FROM GENESIS ON THE CEILING.
WHEN THE POPE RETURNED WITH HIS TAIL BETWEEN HIS GOWNS HE RUSHED TO THE CHAPEL TO SEE WHAT MIKE HAD DONE. MICHELANGELO EXCITEDLY POINTED TO THE SCENES ON THE CEILING AND SAID…”SO, WHATDYATHINK, JULIE, BABY?” JULIUS WAS STUNNED. THIS IS WHERE THE CULTURE PART COMES IN – AFTER STUDYING EVERY SCRAP OF PARCHMENT OF THE TIMES, THE GEZZER FOUND OUT THAT POPE JULIUS SCREAMED BLOODY MURDER. “SHMUCK, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?” “I PAINTED THE CEILING LIKE YOU WANTED. JUST DIG THE SCENES UP THERE.” “MICHELANGELO YOU ARE A FIRST CLASS PUTZ!” “WHY? YOU TOLD ME TO PAINT THE CEILING.” “YES, BUT I THOUGHT MAYBE YOU’D PAINT IT IN YELLOW – I DIDN’T EVEN CARE IF YOU USED TWO COATS. WHAT POCESSED YOU TO PAINT ALL THOSE NAKED PEOPLE?”
SO, IT’S A LITTLE KNOWN FACT THAT MICHELANGELO’S MOST FAMOUS PAINTING – THE SISTINE CHAPEL -- WAS A MISTAKE. NEXT TIME YOU VISIT IT LOOK UP AND IMAGINE THE CELING IN A NICE YELLOW.
BACK TO THE BRILLIANT MICHELANGELO. HE WAS A WORLD FAMOUS RENAISSANCE SCULPTURE, PAINTER, ARCHITECT…AND HOMOSEXUAL. HE LIVED AND WORKED IN THE EARLY 15-HUNDREDS. NOT MANY GAY BARS IN THOSE DAYS BUT HE WAS AHEAD OF HIS TIMES AND HAD A COLLECTION OF JUDY GARLAND RECORDS.
MICELANGELO IS FAMOUS FOR HIS PIETA AND HIS DAVID. I’M NOT TALKING ABOUT HIS SHVANTZ….IT’S AN INCREDIBLE SCULPTURE. BUT “MIKE” AS HE LIKED TO BE CALLED, MOST FAMOUS ART WORK WAS THE SISTINE CHAPEL IN ROME. POPE JULIUS II – (FAMILY NAME OF GOLDBERG) – YES, THERE WERE MANY JEWISH POPE’S…POPE SHECKY, THE FIRST, COMES TO MIND. – JULIE, BECAME MIKE’S PATRON AND ONE DAY COMMISSIONED HIM TO PAINT THE CEILING OF THE SISTINE CHAPEL. MIKE TOOK THE ASSIGNMENT AND TOLD JULIUS, WHO WAS ABOUT TO LEAVE ROME TO START ANOTHER WAR, NOT TO WORRY –LEAVE EVERYTHING IN MIKE’S FILTHY HANDS. I SAY “FILTHY” BECAUSE MICHELANGELO NEVER WASHED. NEVER! HIS FATHER HAD TOLD HIM THAT WASHING IS THE CAUSE OF THE BLACK PLAGUE…AND BRITTLE HAIR.
JULIUS WENT OFF TO WAR AND MIKE BEGAN PAINTING THE SISTINE CHAPEL. IT TOOK HIM SEVERAL YEARS AND HE COULDN’T WAIT TO SHOW OLD JULIE THE SCENES FROM GENESIS ON THE CEILING.
WHEN THE POPE RETURNED WITH HIS TAIL BETWEEN HIS GOWNS HE RUSHED TO THE CHAPEL TO SEE WHAT MIKE HAD DONE. MICHELANGELO EXCITEDLY POINTED TO THE SCENES ON THE CEILING AND SAID…”SO, WHATDYATHINK, JULIE, BABY?” JULIUS WAS STUNNED. THIS IS WHERE THE CULTURE PART COMES IN – AFTER STUDYING EVERY SCRAP OF PARCHMENT OF THE TIMES, THE GEZZER FOUND OUT THAT POPE JULIUS SCREAMED BLOODY MURDER. “SHMUCK, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?” “I PAINTED THE CEILING LIKE YOU WANTED. JUST DIG THE SCENES UP THERE.” “MICHELANGELO YOU ARE A FIRST CLASS PUTZ!” “WHY? YOU TOLD ME TO PAINT THE CEILING.” “YES, BUT I THOUGHT MAYBE YOU’D PAINT IT IN YELLOW – I DIDN’T EVEN CARE IF YOU USED TWO COATS. WHAT POCESSED YOU TO PAINT ALL THOSE NAKED PEOPLE?”
SO, IT’S A LITTLE KNOWN FACT THAT MICHELANGELO’S MOST FAMOUS PAINTING – THE SISTINE CHAPEL -- WAS A MISTAKE. NEXT TIME YOU VISIT IT LOOK UP AND IMAGINE THE CELING IN A NICE YELLOW.
posted by THE RANTING OLD GEEZER at 11:39 AM
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