KEEPING A BREAST OF THINGS......
The Justice Department under new Attorney General Alberto Gonzales has declared female mammary glands legal once again. His decision is a great victory for men and women and especially the brassiere industry. Cross your heart has a whole new meaning.
Former Attorney General, John Ashcroft, a conservative, born-again cretin had declared bosoms un-American and dirty objects. Obviously Ashcroft was not breast-fed as a child and believed that nipples were a threat to American society. Once in office, John, decided that pictures of him standing in front of the Spirit of Justice was somehow subversive. Spirit of Justice, with her one breast exposed and her arms raised caused him to shake like a victim of Huntington’s disease. He was fearful of a breast showing up behind him in television or newspaper pictures. This sexually repressed man considered tits more dangerous than the Mafia and Taliban combined. Every time someone mentioned Playboy Magazine John tried to issue an Orange Alert. Ashcroft tried to arrest everyone working in the Justice Department's commissary when he found out they were serving breast of turkey.
To save the country from the sight of Justice’s boob he installed blue drapes to cover her up in 2002 at the cost of $8,000.00. For 3-1/2 years visitors to the Justice Department came face to face with a blue curtain with something rigid sticking out from it. Many tourists wondered why the blue curtain had a boner. I guess Ashcroft wasn’t bothered by hard-ons just titties.
Don’t you wonder why President Bush didn’t declare Ashcroft mentally unbalanced and send him to the Republican Home for the Silly. I realize there’s a waiting list to get in…..
So, America, once again it’s legal to have, see, love, suckle and fondle breasts again. What a country
Former Attorney General, John Ashcroft, a conservative, born-again cretin had declared bosoms un-American and dirty objects. Obviously Ashcroft was not breast-fed as a child and believed that nipples were a threat to American society. Once in office, John, decided that pictures of him standing in front of the Spirit of Justice was somehow subversive. Spirit of Justice, with her one breast exposed and her arms raised caused him to shake like a victim of Huntington’s disease. He was fearful of a breast showing up behind him in television or newspaper pictures. This sexually repressed man considered tits more dangerous than the Mafia and Taliban combined. Every time someone mentioned Playboy Magazine John tried to issue an Orange Alert. Ashcroft tried to arrest everyone working in the Justice Department's commissary when he found out they were serving breast of turkey.
To save the country from the sight of Justice’s boob he installed blue drapes to cover her up in 2002 at the cost of $8,000.00. For 3-1/2 years visitors to the Justice Department came face to face with a blue curtain with something rigid sticking out from it. Many tourists wondered why the blue curtain had a boner. I guess Ashcroft wasn’t bothered by hard-ons just titties.
Don’t you wonder why President Bush didn’t declare Ashcroft mentally unbalanced and send him to the Republican Home for the Silly. I realize there’s a waiting list to get in…..
So, America, once again it’s legal to have, see, love, suckle and fondle breasts again. What a country
posted by THE RANTING OLD GEEZER at 5:38 PM
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