HAD ANY SEX LATELY?
This one could ruin the Ranting Old Geezer. But as your intrepid reporter I’m willing to brave the criticism and even go to jail to protect my sources. Judith Miller isn’t the only Judith Miller.
Anyone not at least 18-years old must stop reading immediately. I expect poison pen letters and shrill accusations that I’m a women hater. These insults will roll off the Old Geezer’s back like water off a newly simonized car
The following conclusions are not mine (tee-hee), they are the results of a year-old survey of over 11,000 men and women aged 16-44. The research was carried out in Britain by scientists interested in human sex drive.
Don’t know about you but I’m very interested in the sex drive. I try to keep my sex drive in top working condition, see that it’s waxed and polished regularly; and is never used in inclement weather.
The main conclusion of the study found the sex drive of women plummets sharply as they juggle increasing demands of partners, children and careers. One in 10 women admitted losing interest in sex for at least six months in the past year. “The next major problem was the inability to have an orgasm. That was reported by 4% of women,” said Dr. Catherine Mercer of University College London.
There’s more but let’s recap: Women’s sex drive goes down as soon as they are faced with responsibility; they lose interest in sex for 6-months at a time; and suffer from the inability to have a climax. These Brit scientists could have saved money and time if they had just gotten a few married men together and asked them, “How’s your sex life.” “What’s that mate?” would have been a normal reply.
“Married women were shown much more likely than single men or women to have sexual problems,” she continued. In other words if a man expects a normal, healthy sex life he shouldn’t get married and just date single girls who don’t know how a toaster works…or buy a blow-up doll named, “Ginger.” Otherwise it’s ‘cold-shower’ time for most of us.
The survey showed that both sexes tend to suffer in silence when faced with sexual problems like lack of sex drive, premature ejaculation or erectile dysfunction. Would you expect some schmuck to stand on a street corner and yell, “I can’t get it up anymore and I’m proud of it”? “My fat husband hasn’t caused me to have an orgasm since the Wright Brothers flew at Kitty Hawk. And then I would have to think of Wilbur to get one.”
54% of women and 35% of men have problems but fewer than 11% of men and 21% of women seek help, according to the survey published in the journal “Sexually Transmitted Infections.” Everyone who subscribes to the journal “Sexually Transmitted Infections” raise your hand?
Be truthful, if someone knocked on your door and introduced themselves as a representative from “Sexually Transmitted Infections” would you welcome them in your home and serve them a cup of Ovaltine? You’d first yell, FEH! then set your pit bull on the sicky while you sandblasted the doorknob that he or she touched.
For both men and women, their first sexual encounter could be crucial to their future attitude toward sex. What that means gentlemen is that you should check out a female’s history with men before you even shake her hand. Women should be forced to take lie-detector tests if they want to see a guy more than once. “The worse the experience, the more difficulty they will have in later life.” Duh! My ex-wife never told me, when she was sixteen, she had a traumatic experience with a cole slaw salesman and couldn’t climax unless you waved a corned-beef sandwich in front of her.
“A lot of women are very active sexually in the first 18-months to three years of a relationship and have a lot of spontaneous sexual desire. But then it goes quicker than a Kenyan runner in a marathon. ,” said Dr. David Goldmeirer from St. Mary’s Hospital in London.
I’m sure you’re happy the Ranting Old Geezer brought these facts to your attention. As for the Geezer, I’m going to think hard about these results and then… join a Gay Men’s choir.
Anyone not at least 18-years old must stop reading immediately. I expect poison pen letters and shrill accusations that I’m a women hater. These insults will roll off the Old Geezer’s back like water off a newly simonized car
The following conclusions are not mine (tee-hee), they are the results of a year-old survey of over 11,000 men and women aged 16-44. The research was carried out in Britain by scientists interested in human sex drive.
Don’t know about you but I’m very interested in the sex drive. I try to keep my sex drive in top working condition, see that it’s waxed and polished regularly; and is never used in inclement weather.
The main conclusion of the study found the sex drive of women plummets sharply as they juggle increasing demands of partners, children and careers. One in 10 women admitted losing interest in sex for at least six months in the past year. “The next major problem was the inability to have an orgasm. That was reported by 4% of women,” said Dr. Catherine Mercer of University College London.
There’s more but let’s recap: Women’s sex drive goes down as soon as they are faced with responsibility; they lose interest in sex for 6-months at a time; and suffer from the inability to have a climax. These Brit scientists could have saved money and time if they had just gotten a few married men together and asked them, “How’s your sex life.” “What’s that mate?” would have been a normal reply.
“Married women were shown much more likely than single men or women to have sexual problems,” she continued. In other words if a man expects a normal, healthy sex life he shouldn’t get married and just date single girls who don’t know how a toaster works…or buy a blow-up doll named, “Ginger.” Otherwise it’s ‘cold-shower’ time for most of us.
The survey showed that both sexes tend to suffer in silence when faced with sexual problems like lack of sex drive, premature ejaculation or erectile dysfunction. Would you expect some schmuck to stand on a street corner and yell, “I can’t get it up anymore and I’m proud of it”? “My fat husband hasn’t caused me to have an orgasm since the Wright Brothers flew at Kitty Hawk. And then I would have to think of Wilbur to get one.”
54% of women and 35% of men have problems but fewer than 11% of men and 21% of women seek help, according to the survey published in the journal “Sexually Transmitted Infections.” Everyone who subscribes to the journal “Sexually Transmitted Infections” raise your hand?
Be truthful, if someone knocked on your door and introduced themselves as a representative from “Sexually Transmitted Infections” would you welcome them in your home and serve them a cup of Ovaltine? You’d first yell, FEH! then set your pit bull on the sicky while you sandblasted the doorknob that he or she touched.
For both men and women, their first sexual encounter could be crucial to their future attitude toward sex. What that means gentlemen is that you should check out a female’s history with men before you even shake her hand. Women should be forced to take lie-detector tests if they want to see a guy more than once. “The worse the experience, the more difficulty they will have in later life.” Duh! My ex-wife never told me, when she was sixteen, she had a traumatic experience with a cole slaw salesman and couldn’t climax unless you waved a corned-beef sandwich in front of her.
“A lot of women are very active sexually in the first 18-months to three years of a relationship and have a lot of spontaneous sexual desire. But then it goes quicker than a Kenyan runner in a marathon. ,” said Dr. David Goldmeirer from St. Mary’s Hospital in London.
I’m sure you’re happy the Ranting Old Geezer brought these facts to your attention. As for the Geezer, I’m going to think hard about these results and then… join a Gay Men’s choir.
posted by THE RANTING OLD GEEZER at 6:57 AM
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