I FEEL PRETTY......
Politicians are by nature very strange, unusual people. They thrive on publicity, talking too much, glad handing people they wouldn’t be caught dead with, pandering to special interests and being in the limelight. There are no shy politicians…boring yes, shy no.
It also seems to go with the territory that many politicos get into trouble doing stupid things: Bill Clinton and Monica, Nixon and Watergate, Gerald Ford driving the golf ball – “Look out! Four! Shit, he hit another old lady.” Etc., etc. The thing is politicians don’t think they’re going to be caught doing embarrassing things. Duh! As far as you can go back there have been political scandals that ruined careers and reputations. George Washington tried to hide the fact that he had wooden teeth but when a “Larry’s Pest Control” truck pulled up to Mount Vernon to deal with an infestation of termites in George’s mouth – he was found out. Things got soooooo bad that when Washington ground his teeth while sleeping he set fire to Martha.
Teddy Roosevelt was blind as a bat. When he said, “Carry a big stick,” he was holding a snake which bit him on his ass. Margaret Thatcher thought no one would know when she went in for her penile enlargement. Wrong. Gary Hart, who had a good chance to be President sacrificed his chances by going on a two day sailing orgy because he found out sex was more fun than having a White House dinner for Robert Novak. Jimmy Carter thought admitting that he once lusted after an albino dwarf would let him off the hook. Schmuck! Ronnie Reagan tried to fool people into thinking he had an I.Q. but when you realized he was married to Nancy that fairy tale crashed and burned. Abe Lincoln was convinced that pictures from his bar-mitzvah would never surface. They did along with his mother’s recipe for kishka.
You can’t hide anything from the media anymore. Never could. There were always snoops and tattlers who would give the politician up. Some did it for money and others just wanted to see themselves on the cover of “Shit Head Magazine.”
The British government just had to admit in a written answer to Parliament that Prime Minister Tony Blair has spent more than $3,130 of taxpayers’ money on make-up and cosmetic artists over the past six years. Is nothing sacred? Are we talking lipstick, rouge, plucked eyebrows and beauty marks? The Queen, on the other hand, spent $0.00 on make up and cosmetic artists in the same period…and she looks it. If you look “dowdy” up in the dictionary – there she’ll be waving. Why would the Brits get upset about this? One of their 14th Century Kings used to dress in a mouse suit and no one cared.
Downing Street revealed that Blair has spent $1,826.66 on cosmetics for the prime minister’s media appearances since 1999. In the past two years, a further $1,376.14 had been spent on make-up artists. Hell, for $500 he could have hired Grandma Moses. How do we know it was for official appearances? Maybe Tony is a cross-dresser and likes to throw drag parties at Downing Street? Is there any thing wrong with a prime minister wanting to look beautiful for visitors? Verily, would the Conservative opposition party expect him to look like some homeless bum while greeting the winning horse in the Steeplechase? A politician has every right to look the best he can, that’ll take people’s eyes off his record.
$3,130.00 is chump change in the scheme of political things. George W. Bush spends more than that on sneering lessons and brush ups on how cowboy’s talk. I happen to think Tony Blair is a handsome man – perhaps a touch too much of eye-liner and blush but no one is perfect. Leave him alone to buy and wear as much make-up as he wants. It never hurt Prince or Little Richard.
It also seems to go with the territory that many politicos get into trouble doing stupid things: Bill Clinton and Monica, Nixon and Watergate, Gerald Ford driving the golf ball – “Look out! Four! Shit, he hit another old lady.” Etc., etc. The thing is politicians don’t think they’re going to be caught doing embarrassing things. Duh! As far as you can go back there have been political scandals that ruined careers and reputations. George Washington tried to hide the fact that he had wooden teeth but when a “Larry’s Pest Control” truck pulled up to Mount Vernon to deal with an infestation of termites in George’s mouth – he was found out. Things got soooooo bad that when Washington ground his teeth while sleeping he set fire to Martha.
Teddy Roosevelt was blind as a bat. When he said, “Carry a big stick,” he was holding a snake which bit him on his ass. Margaret Thatcher thought no one would know when she went in for her penile enlargement. Wrong. Gary Hart, who had a good chance to be President sacrificed his chances by going on a two day sailing orgy because he found out sex was more fun than having a White House dinner for Robert Novak. Jimmy Carter thought admitting that he once lusted after an albino dwarf would let him off the hook. Schmuck! Ronnie Reagan tried to fool people into thinking he had an I.Q. but when you realized he was married to Nancy that fairy tale crashed and burned. Abe Lincoln was convinced that pictures from his bar-mitzvah would never surface. They did along with his mother’s recipe for kishka.
You can’t hide anything from the media anymore. Never could. There were always snoops and tattlers who would give the politician up. Some did it for money and others just wanted to see themselves on the cover of “Shit Head Magazine.”
The British government just had to admit in a written answer to Parliament that Prime Minister Tony Blair has spent more than $3,130 of taxpayers’ money on make-up and cosmetic artists over the past six years. Is nothing sacred? Are we talking lipstick, rouge, plucked eyebrows and beauty marks? The Queen, on the other hand, spent $0.00 on make up and cosmetic artists in the same period…and she looks it. If you look “dowdy” up in the dictionary – there she’ll be waving. Why would the Brits get upset about this? One of their 14th Century Kings used to dress in a mouse suit and no one cared.
Downing Street revealed that Blair has spent $1,826.66 on cosmetics for the prime minister’s media appearances since 1999. In the past two years, a further $1,376.14 had been spent on make-up artists. Hell, for $500 he could have hired Grandma Moses. How do we know it was for official appearances? Maybe Tony is a cross-dresser and likes to throw drag parties at Downing Street? Is there any thing wrong with a prime minister wanting to look beautiful for visitors? Verily, would the Conservative opposition party expect him to look like some homeless bum while greeting the winning horse in the Steeplechase? A politician has every right to look the best he can, that’ll take people’s eyes off his record.
$3,130.00 is chump change in the scheme of political things. George W. Bush spends more than that on sneering lessons and brush ups on how cowboy’s talk. I happen to think Tony Blair is a handsome man – perhaps a touch too much of eye-liner and blush but no one is perfect. Leave him alone to buy and wear as much make-up as he wants. It never hurt Prince or Little Richard.
posted by THE RANTING OLD GEEZER at 8:37 PM
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