MICKEY MOUSE IS HORNY.

Walt Disney must be turning over in his grave. Actually his ice box. I understand his pillow is some ice cubes. Why should this icon of family values, clean living and innocent fun be upset? Because his name as been soiled as much as a drunk’s underwear.

Believe it or not, some employees at its Paris theme park decided to make some videos simulating sex while dressed as Disney characters. Can you imagine? When the big shots at Disney found out they pushed their bowls of cottage cheese away and screamed, “Golly.” They also “took appropriate action.” What the hell is “appropriate action” at Disney, pulling Dumbo’s ears?

“The behavior show on the videos is inexcusable and unacceptable,” a Disney statement proclaimed. It’s difficult for the Geezer to believe that any executives at Disney know what a sex act is? I’ve heard that all female employees are given chastity belts when they’re hired. The company is more conservative than Karl Rove.

“The video was taken in the backstage area not accessible to visitors.” Duh. Did Disney think that they’d tape in on one of the rides? One of the videos shows Minnie Mouse struggling to free herself as she is fucked in the butt by Goofy while she says, “Go eat a bowl of puke.” That’s’ funny…funnier than any Disney film done in the last ten years. Another shows Mickey Mouse going down on Chip and Dale, the chipmunks. Hysterical. They also show Grumpy, Doc and Sleepy in acts of masturbation.

If Disney had a brain in their furry heads they’d put the tapes out in DVD and outsell Regis Philbin singing Welsh Mining Songs. Since the dicks at Disney fired these creative and funny employees – the kids are thinking of opening a comedy store called, “Tickle my Testicles.”