DON'T STICK YOUR TONGUE OUT AT ME.

One of the keys to any relationship is being able to share mutual interests. To have things in common. I know not from where I speak because the Geezer is a pretty shallow guy. Buying a woman a second cup of coffee was considered a commitment by me.

The truth is no matter the age of a couple if they enjoy spending ‘quality’ time with each other that relationship has a good chance of working. An important attribute in helping maintain a balance between man and woman is being able to entertain, enliven and delight one another by participating in the same recreations and inquisitiveness. It doesn’t matter if it’s playing golf or tennis together; sharing the love of cooking; doing crossword puzzles; attending the opera or concerts; traveling, etc., the simple act of doing it together is the key to success.

When a husband and wife are not on the same wave-length it becomes pretty obvious. All of us have seen couples who have been married many years sharing a table and breaking bread in some cheap restaurant during their travels and never saying a word, let alone a civil one, to the other person. He usually is wearing a stupid baseball cap and looking right past his wife as he gums his gruel down. She looks like she’d rather be raped by a gang of Turkish sailors than be at the table. It’s a sad sight and one not to be duplicated by any intelligent couple.

That’s why when I hear about a couple who really enjoy the same passions I nod my head in appreciation and envy and want to pass it on to you. A Mexican couple falls into that category. Their shared passion is “hate!” They are recovering separately after a martial spat that got slightly out of control. No, they weren’t indulging in the usual whinny, name-calling, angry shouting match that all of us are familiar with. What a bore. These two resorted to creative behavior to show their displeasure with one another. They began firing guns, throwing knives and hurling homemade bombs at each other. Hell, if you’re going to have an argument then pull out all stops. Don’t pussy around.

In a scene straight out of last year’s movie “Mr. and Mrs. Smith” these happy Chicanos fought until their house blew up in a homemade gasoline bomb explosion. When the police arrived the wife was taken to the hospital with third-degree burns and the husband was arrested. After the dust had literally settled, along with some roof tiles, they both thought over the reasons for their domestic dispute and calmer heads prevailed. He told reporters that he was glad his wife had suffered burns while she said she was only sorry she had not “hacked off his manhood” during the fight.

There’s a lesson to be learned from this incident. It doesn’t pay to stifle your anger or frustration during a brawl. That will only cause headaches and a possible ulcer. It’s far better to let it all hang out – that is unless you have had your ‘manhood hacked off.”